Musings in the calm before the storm

I am still knocking around ideas for my $400 gift card. I haven’t actually gotten it in the mail yet.  I’ve decided to make it my personal goal to shop as wisely as possible with that gift card and chronicle my shopping journey on here.  I suspect that by the end of my $400 I will have learned something about myself and honed my savings skills. Right now, I am in the planning stage, not just how to use my winning gift card, but for Christmas, which is fast approaching.  Now is the calm before the storm, the storm being our Christmas cookie baking and the wrapping of the gifts.  I already sent out my Christmas cards and did the shopping (all year, not just after Thanksgiving). I won’t feel at peace and prepared until that baking is done, the gifts are wrapped, and my house is clean.  (no, it did not stay neat from my mass cleaning preparations before Thanksgiving. I do still have a 6-year-old who loves her projects)

I have a quirky sense of humor, or else I am just going mad, but this morning’s e-mail had me chuckling.  I’m afraid my spam filter manages to filter out approximately 100 ads but a good 10 or 15 that come through are downright pornographic! I used to just delete my spam box automatically, until I realized I was missing some personal e-mail that ended up in my spam. (My recent e-mail from a publisher was actually in my spam, so I am definitely checking my spam now)

Still, there are plenty of ads in my inbox.  This morning one from a woman’s plus size fashion company advertised their new line of plus size jewelry and fragrances.  I couldn’t help but chuckle at the image of a marketer deciding that bigger women needed some kind of special fragrance. What? To cover up their unmistakable odor of grease and doughnuts? The jewelry line I could understand; bigger bracelets for the corpulent wrists, larger rings for the sausage-like fingers, but the plus size fragrance?  (realize here, dear voluptuous readers, and I count myself among you,  I have a wry sense of humor and a caustic wit~ I may wear some plus-size clothing but I do not now, and never have had or regard anyone else’s wrists as corpulent or fingers as sausages! Instead, I am imagining a slim gentleman in an expensive suit sitting at a desk and designing the plus-size jewelry and what he is thinking as he does so)

Well, as it turns out, the fragrance was just regular skinny people fragrance advertised in the same description as the plus-size jewelry, as in “Now~ we have added plus-size jewelry and fragrance to our website,” and not “plus-size jewelry AND plus-size fragrance,” but still. It had me chuckling to myself.  It reminded me of the Dove Pro-Age products that came out a couple years ago designated for “women of a certain age.” I can understand the shampoo and conditioner, and even the lotion. Hair and skin gets drier as we age. But the deodorant?? Are our underarms that different as we age, and if they are, is that really something we need or want to know?  I wondered, then, whose idea that special line of deodorants was, and what kind of marketing plan it entailed.  What were they thinking? Say, these 50-plus women would like to go to the store and buy their own special deodorant with the code name Pro-Age and basically announce to the cashier,their families, strangers in line, and God and all of creation that they have OLD underarms.

Yea. Wonder how that product went over.  I still see the shampoo on the shelves, but I gotta admit, I haven’t seen that Pro-Age deodorant for a while.

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